Marriage with Respect to the Canons of the Church

A review by Jeffrey C. Smith on Fr. John Meyendorff's Marriage: An Orthodox Perspective

When we look at the canons on marriage, we see neither a system nor a code, but occasional and specifically targeted rules on various issues of living the Christian life. The Canons point out that marriage is honorable, and that unity of faith is a prerequisite to marriage. Successive marriages are discouraged. Those who are married a second time are to be excommunicated for a year. The second marriage is not crowned in the church. If a man wants to marry a third time, let him do so, but he is to abstain from communion for five years, and even then he may receive only three times a year. Remarriage after divorce requires penance. Priests and deacons should not dissolve their marriages upon ordination. "What God has joined together, let man not separate" (Matt.19:6) "Are you married? Do not seek a divorce." (I.Cor.7:27). No successive marriages are possible for priests or their wives, and he who has been married twice after baptism cannot become be ordained. He who marries a widow, slave or actress cannot be ordained. Members of the clergy cannot marry after their ordination. The wife of him who has advanced to the episcopacy shall be separated from her husband. She shall enter a monastery and enjoy the bishop’s provision, and she may advance to the dignity of deaconess.

Fr. Meyendorff writes that the union between husband and wife is an end, an eternal union between two unique and eternal personalities that cannot be broken. But the law is never compelling and could be dissolved in the case of fornication. The gift of marriage can be accepted, freely lived, and can be rejected by man. But "love never fails." (I Cor.13:8) Marriage is not broken by death. Marriage is the unique union of two beings in love who can transcend their own humanity and thus be united not only with each other but also in Christ.

The general position of the church seems to have been to discourage all second marriages, and to point to a single matrimony as the more excellent way. Second marriages are not to be condemned, but received less honor. The Orthodox do not prohibit second marriages, but neither do we approve of marriages frequently reiterated.

Let us look more closely at the canons that concern marriage. The Council at Gangra stated that some people ran into the error of condemning any marriage as sinful. The Fathers wrote anathema to him who disregards legitimate marriage; Anathema to him who hesitates to receive communion from a married priest; Anathema to him who is a virgin because he abhors marriage, not on account of the beauty of virginity itself.

Quinisext stated that we should marry within the faith. An Orthodox man is not permitted to marry a heretical woman. If it is done, the marriage should be dissolved, as sheep should not be joined with a wolf. But if they were married before conversion, let them remain united, for the wife sanctifies the unbelieving husband, and the husband sanctifies the unbelieving wife.

The Apostolic Canons stated that he who has been married twice after baptism cannot be ordained, and he who marries a widow, divorced woman, harlot, maidservant, or actress cannot be ordained.

The Old and New Testament readings in the marriage ceremony are very important. It was a chain of generations that led to the coming of Christ. God himself became a man with a specific ancestry. Christ was the goal and product of Israel’s history. When Jesus changes water into wine in Cana, He points to a transfiguration of old into new, a passage from death to life. During the crowning, we are reminded of the Gospel, the cross, and the entry into His kingdom.

Second marriage is inconsistent with the Christian norm. Those who enter a second marriage must abstain from communion for a year. A third marriage implies a penance of three years. The order for a second marriage is deliberately penitential. The church formally forbids fourth marriages. Economy is not an open door to limitless compromise.

Unity of faith is a formal condition for marriage. The Councils of Laodicea, Carthage as well as the Fourth and Sixth ecumenical council all forbid marriage between Orthodox and non-Orthodox. Is it possible to become one body without participating in the Eucharist? An Orthodox priest could never bless a marriage between an Orthodox and a non-Christian. But if one converted to Christianity after marriage, that was not a reason to divorce.

In Rome, marriage was a legal contract, legally indissoluble, and concerning only earthly life, so it could be legally dissolved after the death of one of the partners. For the Orthodox, marriage is a sacrament conferred upon the partners in the Body of the Church. It pertains to the eternal life in the Kingdom of God, and is not dissolved by death of one of the partners, but creates an eternal bond. Marriage is a gift of grace, and it is possible that the partners made a mistake and were not ready for this grace. The Church may admit that grace was not received and tolerate separation and remarriage. St. Paul writes that if a woman separates from her husband, she should remain single. (I Cor.7:11) Jesus himself said, "Anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to commit adultery, and anyone who marries a woman so divorced commits adultery." (Matt.5:31) The Fathers also discouraged remarriage, but admitted divorce and remarriage as a regular social institution. The Church never officially or formally denounced divorce laws.

If sex equals sin, as it is sometimes viewed to be in Rome, both marriage and procreation would be poor substitutes for the Christian ideal of celibacy. In the Orthodox view, childbirth is a natural, holy and God-like privilege. Is not continence in marriage a form of limiting this God-bestowed power? Sex within marriage is holy, but abortion or terminating pregnancy is murder. Canon 91 of the Sixth Ecumenical Council said that abortion is murder, and "We pay no attention to whether the fetus was formed or unformed.

Married men can be admitted to the clergy, but cannot marry after ordination. Quinisext 6 forbade marriage after ordination, as a man seeking a wife necessarily lacks stability. The main reason why a priest cannot remarry is that the Church recognizes one eternal union of husband and wife as the norm. The Episcopal rank is reserved for non-married men. The sixth council does admit married men to the episcopate provided that they separate from their wives by mutual consent. Just as marriage implies sacrifice, family building, dedication and maturity, so celibacy is unthinkable without prayer, fasting, obedience, humility, charity, and constant ascetical effort. Both marriage and celibacy are ways of living the Gospel and anticipating the kingdom.

In conclusion, Fr. Meyendorff writes that the canonical side of Christian marriage indicates the way the Christian ideal can be maintained in our present world. The canons are a guide. But the deep meaning of marriage as sacrament cannot be understood outside the Eucharistic context. Marriage is a sacrament because through it, the Kingdom of God becomes a living experience, and the sacrament is applied to our concrete human existence.